Do we make it impossible for people to love us?

Do we make it impossible for people to love us?

Do we make it impossible for people to love us?

I was watching this video of a woman who had the longest list of dating requirements for a guy.

Isn’t this amazing? Rather than try to accept someone for who they are, she wants someone who is a fantasy. I was thinking how often we try to apply this principle to other things in our life.

In many situations we say that we can’t be happy unless we have x, y or z. We think that if life is the way we want it, somehow we are happier. We can see from the lives of millionaires this is not true. People get things and situations and that doesn’t make them happier. I think that if this woman found a man like this, she would find another reason to reject him.

It seems so clear to me now. After dealing with people who can’t accept others, it is just about themselves. She feels like this guy has to do this all these things to gain her approval and love. So she thinks that love and approval are based on how we fill someone else needs. I have no doubt that at some point in her life she had people who said she was only worth love if she acted in a certain way, and so she applies that same idea to others.

I am not judging her. She has the right to want whatever she wants. I do think it is telling however that after 8 years of not finding someone, she still believes this person exists. Even if he does exist, the problem isn’t with the person it is obviously with herself. She has so many issues that prevent her from being authentic, that it would be a challenge for the most healthy man to have a relationship with her. A healthy man wouldn’t want to have a relationship with her because he knows that she could not have a healthy relationship with him.

We say everything about yourself in how we treat other people.

Similar Posts: