You might have learned in life to never take the first offer that is presented. It really is surprising how it always works in your favor.
I had a friend who was very responsible and always paid his bills. He had one credit card and he always paid it off every month. So while I was his roommate he always got a ton of credit card offers. I offered to help deal with mail so I would open them up and let him know the terms. A funny thing happened. Every month he would get a better offer than the month before. It would be a lower interest rate, a higher credit limit, or some other feature. It was remarkable how the less you wanted credit, the more desperate they were to give it to you.
It seems that way with relationships as well. The people who are desperate for relationships seem to be not valued by others, while those who have issues and are crazy seem to be in high demand. Isn’t it strange that we seem to apply a supply and demand mentality to relationships? If someone is available, they must not be any good, but if they are taken, they must be good? Studies show that women prefer dating married men, and that employees are most valued when they are already working for another company.
Does this make sense? Is someone automatically a better person because they have a job or relationship? I don’t think so. There are plenty of unhealthy relationships and jobs, and just being in one doesn’t make you a better person. What is my goal in this article? My point is that when we take the first offer, we communicate that we can’t discriminate and that we don’t have standards, and that doesn’t help anyone.
I made the mistake of working in jobs and having relationships that I shouldn’t have. I would have been ahead of the game by recognizing the mistake sooner, and not engaging them. Easier said than done right? I think one of the mistakes that optimistic people make is we think people grow as much as we do. Not everyone does, and we have to be realistic and accept that fact.
If you take the first offer in business or life, you will regret it.